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at 219 am there's no one else to vent my angst on. I'm actually more or less finished my fst report which is only due next week -.- But it was so much less painful to do. I'm once again stuck on the cm one with no idea what to write about in my introduction. Haven't even gotten to the discussion (which i am clueless about too). sigh sigh sigh this is the life suck it up lydia.
I function immensely well (to a certain extent) on stress. Which kept me up till 430 last night/this morning. and popped awake spontaneously at 8am. less stress today is making me doze off now. gonna limit myself to 7 hours of sleep from now on. and spend the rest of my time being a mugger toad! (or watching heroes or playing ds. okay fat hope
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| Today i walked into the store room in m401 and saw the sec4s there and when i asked them why they were still in school at 730pm they said they were tiaoing pins/tuning the frets and i felt like a very proud senior cos once upon a time i was the cool senior who helped all the people tune their bridges before concert/syfs, and they were the clueless juniors who knew nuts about bridges. Anyway nyco concert in 2 days and i really feels like i never graduated, despite the all grown up and unidentifiable juniors.
After prac i hopped on a 67 and took a nice long bus ride allllll the way back to tampines. And realised that i have an emotional attachment to a freaking bus service. No matter how dark and crowded and smelly it is it will always be my favourite bus. Even in the dark i can look up from my book at any point of the journey and look out the window and immediately identify my location, goes to show the crazy amount of time i spend on that bus. Plus, i seriously appreciate all the rest and naps it's allowed me to have the past 6 years.
My emails getting flooded and i feel school/hall/orientation coming at me and even though nothing's happening yet i feel like it's inches away from knocking me out. ): My dear life soon gonna be sucked away from me i want to run away to sydney and eat strawberries.
Driving tmr and i really want to watch nyco's audi prac!
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| Not really but sure feels like. Probably cos i've been running in and out of the house doing i have no idea what which makes life less mundane.
My tolerance for a busy life is incredibly low now. Make me do >3 activities in a day and i can drop dead. The 3 activities don't even have to be long or tiring. So the weekend before vcf foc i was having fun being busy and then on the first day of camp i was totally dying and falling asleep during icebreakers/wacko, and stoning away while mich tried to talk to me only to realise i had no idea she was there, much less listening to her. Anyway camp was awesome and i'm so glad i went for it.
Anyway now i look at my organiser and want to shrivel up and die cos like, hall orientation and fac orientation and random rubbish like registration and medical check up running from like next week till school starts and i so do not look forward to travelling to nus on a regular basis roar. On one hand i know i should get my ass down and figure nus out and make friends and not be anti-social but i seriously want to just enjoy my last two weeks and be happy and carefree and not boggled down by all these.
Gonna be driving alot the next 2 weeks my instructor tried to tell me to cancel lessons cos i don't need so many but i'm freaking kiasu and probably gonna go for them anyway? I dont feel confident of anything, probably cos i haven't driven for the past 1.5plus weeks.Though i basically managed to do everything (yay including parking!!!) quite well by the end of my lesson today. Oh wells we'll see how it goes i'm gonna be an awesome driverrrrr.
Determined to get my hair cut tmr. And pls figure out how to bid/what modules to bid on thanks. And i want to eat ice cream.
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| today i had lunch with melissayong fullstop that's all.
Oh and was VERY rudely awakened at 9plus cos my room started seriously vibrating cos some nice neighbour was drilling and hacking away at their house. Thanks.
I think the Simon Bolivar Youth Orchestra is freaking cool. Their conductor i can't remember his name too. It shall be my dream to play in some string/symphony orchestra. Go lydia.
My brain has deteriorated to such a state that i get an intellectual kick out of playing picross on the ds.
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| I miss playing in an orchestra a mega lot. A proper, full orchestra with guanyue and tanbo and percussion, and musicians who want to be there, and having fun producing nice, heartfelt music together. I think its been more than a year since i played in a proper orchestra (last time was probably syf/artsfest sigh), and i miss the feeling of enjoying practices, looking forward to every single practice (as in nanyang days) because of both the music and friends.
But somehow i doubt i'll get a chance to again. I think its sad/laughable how something which used to be such a huge part of my life (very huge actually ) has diminished into non-existence.
All these memoriessssss gushing through my head now. But okay shall just be proud of uhh having been part of the nyco and hcco legacy and not wallow in nostalgia anymore.
I'm starting to enjoy driving again cos i finally cleared parking ytd! yayness after 4 lessons seriously. Plus i finally went on to the roads again. And my instructor was commenting how relaxed/confident i was driving on the road. Only because i was so terribly bored of staying in the circuit and doing boring things like parking and queuing to park.
Would be going to sleep now if not for the fact that i woke at 12noon and felt sleepy at 4 and went back to sleep so hopeless when i stay home seriously.
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